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Subject: Joke!


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Original Message                 Date: 07-Nov-02  @  05:46 PM   -   Some nice light-hearted childish humour!

Si

Posts: 165

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This radio DJ decides to have a competition. So he gets on the air and announces that he'd like people to call in with an interesting word that he hasn't heard before, and put it into a sentence.

He takes a few calls, then gets to this guy:

DJ : Ok caller, you're on the air, what's your word?
Caller : 'Gwaan'
DJ : Gwaan, ok, put that into a sentence
Caller : Gwaan fuck yourself!

The DJ promptly ends the call and apologises to his listeners, then plays a few tunes. About 10 minutes later he takes a few more calls, and gets to another guy....

DJ : Ok caller, you're on the air, what's your word?
Caller : 'Smee'
DJ : Smee, and can you put that into a sentence for us?
Caller : Smee again, gwaan fuck yourself!



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Message 11/20                 Date: 08-Nov-02  @  06:13 AM   -   RE: Joke!

JX3P0

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Conic Book Classic.

H- LOL!



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Message 12/20                 Date: 08-Nov-02  @  02:50 PM   -   RE: Joke!

cheddarrrr tsh

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Husband: "How come you never tell me when you come honey?"

Wife: "Cos your never there"



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Message 13/20                 Date: 13-Nov-02  @  09:44 PM   -   RE: Joke!

bedwyr

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two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar

atom1 "i've lost my electron"

atom2 "you sure?"

atom1 "yeah, i'm positive"



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Message 14/20                 Date: 13-Nov-02  @  09:52 PM   -   RE: Joke!

Zazza

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positive.. very good.. hehe  



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Message 15/20                 Date: 20-Nov-02  @  12:17 AM   -   RE: Joke!

psylichon

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probably old and definitely distasteful but undeniably funny:

How do they know Princess Diana had dandruff?

They found her head and shoulders in the glove compartment.

psylichon



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Message 16/20                 Date: 20-Nov-02  @  01:47 AM   -   RE: Joke!

jon s

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bedwyr wins the cringe factor - ouch!



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Message 17/20                 Date: 26-Nov-02  @  02:46 PM   -   RE: Joke!

k

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Three elderly women are basking naked in a sauna, enjoying their day at
the spa. Suddenly there is a beeping sound. The first lady presses her
forearm and the beeping abruptly stops. Her two companions look at her
curiously and she explains, "That's my new pager. I have a microchip
embedded under the skin of my forearm, so it's with me at all times."

About 10 minutes later a phone rings. The second old lady lifts the palm
of her right hand to her ear, and begins speaking. Upon finishing her
conversation, she explains to her companions, "That's my mobile phone. I
have a microchip in my hand that allows me to be in touch with anyone at all times."


The third older woman is feeling decidedly low-tech and out of step with
her thoroughly modern friends. She excuses herself and temporarily exits
the sauna. In a few minutes, she returns with a piece of toilet paper
dangling from her derriere. Her chums are somewhat aghast and raise
their eyebrows in embarrassment for her.


Noting their reaction, the old lady retorts smugly, "I'm getting a Fax!"

___________________________________

I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!



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Message 18/20                 Date: 27-Nov-02  @  03:11 PM   -   RE: Joke!

Si

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Two old ladies were sitting on a bench having a quiet chat, when a flasher approached from across the park. He stood right in front of them and opened his trench coat, exposing himself.

One of the ladies immediately had a stroke.

The other lady, being older and more feeble, couldn't reach that far.



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Message 19/20                 Date: 27-Nov-02  @  03:46 PM   -   RE: Joke!

milan

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:O! :D!



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Message 20/20                 Date: 27-Nov-02  @  05:14 PM     Edit: 27-Nov-02  |  05:15 PM   -   RE: Joke!

k

Posts: 12353

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two old dears decide to do a streak though the old peoples home for a laugh, so they strip off and go tearing thru the lounge where everyones sitting about...

two old boys see the two women flash past at high speed and out of the other door... they look at each other ...

"did you see that 'arry?"

"aye!"

"who was it?"

"Dunno... but whatever they had on needs a damn good ironing!"

___________________________________

I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!



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