Original Message 1/39                 Date: 20-Sep-05  @  06:08 PM   -   fcuking welsh

beds

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hehe just read this ... apparently blair isn't averse to some swearing at the taffs




[from the times]
Pass notes
No 6: THE F***ING WELSH

Esgusodwch fi?

You heard me, I said the f***ing Welsh. The Prime Minister said it and so can I.

Esgusodwch fi?

And thats another thing I cant stand about you people. You speak English behind our backs but when you come near us you start speaking in Welsh.

Esgusodwch fi?

As I was saying. Tony Blair allegedly shouted F****** Welsh when it looked as if Labour might lose the first Welsh Assembly elections, according to Lance Price, the former Labour spin-doctor. I never thought he had it in him.

Esgusodwch fi?

Dont pretend you cant understand me. Loquacious, immoral, stunted, bigoted, dark, ugly, pugnacious little trolls that was A.A. Gill, 1998. Of coursehe got savaged for that  by, guesswho, the Welsh  but he was spot on. Are you listening to me?

Esgusodwch fi?

Not forgetting Anne Robinson. She said that she would like to banish the Welsh into oblivion in Room 101: Ive never taken to them. What are they for? she said. No one in their right mind would go holidaying in Pwllheli, she said. You look the type to come from Pwllheli.

Esgusodwch fi?

But then the police spent £3,800 on an inquiry into her anti-Welsh comments. They assigned four officers to the case. Two of them even went to London, to interview Greg Dyke, the BBC Director-General. £3,800! Of our money. What is Wales, anyway? Ill tell you what it is  a unit of measurement, as in an area the size of Wales.

Esgusodwch fi?

Please, I beg of you, stop using that funny language. I cant take it any more. I admit it, I was traumatised by Ivor the Engine as a boy  but I can change. I have a terrible crush on Charlotte Church. Its agony. Anthony Hopkins is the greatest living British actor. Its all true. Just stop shutting me out.

F***ing English.

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Message 2/39                 Date: 20-Sep-05  @  07:02 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

milan

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Message 3/39                 Date: 20-Sep-05  @  11:05 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

k

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heh, after that Anne Robinson thing i was going to me mums and as i got near the border a van passed me quite slowly in the middle lane of the m4 and written in the dirt it said

"I hate Anne Robinson"




is it just me, or when you look at her on tv do you automaticaly think she must have an S&M den at home in the basement?

___________________________________

I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!

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Message 4/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  09:24 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

Zazza

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It's just you K, honest...

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Message 5/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  09:25 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

Zazza

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It's just you K, honest...

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Message 6/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  10:46 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

k

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i bet she's a right dutty cow

___________________________________

I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!

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Message 7/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  11:10 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

beds

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she's a scouse slapper, the doity slaag.

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Message 8/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  11:45 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

Jock Munro

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I agree with K, I reckon she loves the odd face full of baby gravy, the tuppeny bint. I'd certainly park the pink.

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Message 9/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  12:54 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

monkeybasket2001

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her face looks more like a stretched dali print every day...either that or her mouth suffered an inverse stroke

i wouldn't touch her slosh-pocket with chris tarrants'......

greg

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Message 10/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  01:24 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

Jock Munro

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ha ha ha ! slosh pocket !

nah, you dont look at the mantlepiece when your stoking the fire. Just imagine her doing all that doity talk whilst yer plugging her rusty, "you are the weakest linHmmpppppffffffffgggnnnnnn"


"take it bitch, say my name, say my name, put yer face on the floor"...etc..etc..

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Message 11/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  02:12 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

k

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lol *cough*

yeah, and also you can always pop into macky-d's and get an empty family meal bag to use if you have central heating and no fireplace, but since the facelift she's not looking so bad, cos lets face it most of these young chicks drink so much & eat such shit food and are such slobs that they all have the bodies of 50 year olds anyways lol.

___________________________________

I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!

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Message 12/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  02:15 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

monkeybasket2001

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im just think at her age her legs are gonna look like a relief map of the andes....still there is always celeb value- some celebs aren't that great looking but would get a hard banging just as punishment for being a celeb...vorderman, kaplinski, etc etc
greg

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Message 13/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  02:16 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

monkeybasket2001

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yeah, and also you can always pop into macky-d's and get an empty family meal bag t
>>>>>>>>>

hehe reminds me of the kfc analogy...

greg

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Message 14/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  02:34 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

Jock Munro

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Vorderman is a BABE, and I LOVE her.

That Kaplinsky is a bit of a stuck up cunt tho. Mind, it would be funny to see the look in her face as you wipe the duncan on her curtains after banging her up the shitter.

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Message 15/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  02:40 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

beds

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vorderman's from rhyl or somewhere equally glamorous

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Message 16/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  02:58 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

Jock Munro

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She' s still a minx. She looks like butter wouldnt melt in her mouth, but I bet my spunk would.

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Message 17/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  03:59 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

monkeybasket2001

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oh totally- thats why she deserves a ramming, and vorderman could carry my remainders any day...

'two from the top and four from the bottom please carol'...

greg

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Message 18/39                 Date: 21-Sep-05  @  04:26 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

Jock Munro

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I wonder if she's ever been tempted to pose for one of the high street rhythm mags like Mayfair, Penthouse, or Mathmaticians Cunt Monthly.

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Message 19/39                 Date: 22-Sep-05  @  10:35 PM     Edit: 22-Sep-05  |  11:47 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

Pongoid

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Anne...well as long as she ain't got any salt amongst the ginger and the lights are down low enough I suppose I could let her get a taste of the nadger stew, course I reckon the old socket looks like a bit of boot-leather or pastrami by now. Mind I'll bet the starfish is nice and resilient if you can get past the odd 'roid lump. And yes I'm sure she's a nasty one with toys named Mbungo the Mandingo Madman, Skippy The Wonderhorse and Superfist (with a cape and all).

Vorderman? Goodness no. I'd lose my lunch berfore she got knickers mid-thigh.

And as for Kaplinsky, you KNOW that pooper is well worked indeed, like bungin a banger down a hallway. Personally I'd love to try to fracture her chin with my seam during a good tea-bagging.

Ahem....as you were, lads...

Ape

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Message 20/39                 Date: 23-Sep-05  @  04:45 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

psylichon

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impressive for a yank wouldn't yall say. i could never do that shit....

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Message 21/39                 Date: 23-Sep-05  @  09:23 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

monkeybasket2001

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impressed he knew who they were yes, wont patronize him by saying impressed by an americans use of language no...

greg

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Message 22/39                 Date: 23-Sep-05  @  02:08 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

k

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yeah, hand on Pongoid, how come you know all these Uk tv personalities so well?

___________________________________

I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!

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Message 23/39                 Date: 23-Sep-05  @  05:54 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

Pongoid

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Who doesn't know the Weakest Link? As for the other two, well I try to stay at least mildly current of personalities abroad, and lets face it, the UK does have some funny ones from time to time, not to mention some pieces of minge that put most of the birds over here to shame.



As for the language, I lived in the UK years ago, and it still haunts me.

Ape

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Message 24/39                 Date: 26-Sep-05  @  03:20 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

monkeybasket2001

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makes sense...no offence to your american brethren but they aren't as lucid when it comes to language...

i remember now that ann robinson went over the states to take the piss out of the for a while- is the US equivelent just as cunty?

so which UK yonny do you rate over US minge?

greg

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Message 25/39                 Date: 26-Sep-05  @  03:49 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

Jock Munro

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aye, I'd like to see Kaplinsky read the news whilst being teabagged.

"Hurricanehmmppfffffff Rita left a trail off hhmmpppffffff devastation acrossss hmmmmmpffffff the gulf of hmmmmmmggnnrrrrrPOP"

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Message 26/39                 Date: 26-Sep-05  @  05:28 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

milan

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*rofl*

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Message 27/39                 Date: 26-Sep-05  @  10:03 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

k

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come to me Natasha... come to me!

phwoaaar

___________________________________

I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!

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Message 28/39                 Date: 11-Oct-05  @  08:25 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

beds

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i don't get what anyone sees in her.

meanwhile ...

the scousers are apologising to the welsh for ethnic cleansing.


what about apologisng for jimmy tarbuck and sonia?

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Message 29/39                 Date: 12-Oct-05  @  02:41 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

k

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too bloody right!

___________________________________

I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!

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Message 30/39                 Date: 13-Oct-05  @  02:50 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

damballah

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from Foreigners Around the World: A Brief Survey of the Various Foreigners,
Their Chief Characteristics, Customs, and Manners





ENGLISH


Racial Characteristics:

Cold-blooded queers with nasty complexions and terrible teeth who once conquered half the world but still haven't figured out central heating. They warm their beers and chill their baths and boil all their food, including bread. An intensely snobbish group, but who exactly they're snubbing is an international mystery. Lately they've been getting their comeuppance world power-wise, as their shabby, antiquated, and bankrupt little back alley of a country slowly winds down like the ill-crafted clockwork playthings of which their undersized children are so fond. In fact, last year their entire government had to kiss the ass of the fat aboriginal nig-nog who runs Uganda to retrieve a single flit hack writer from the clutches of that august nation. They all have large collections of something useless like lamp finials or toad eggs, and they would have lost both world wars if it were not for us. They like to be spanked with canes and that's just what they deserve.


Good Points:

It's relatively easy to make yourself understood with them.


Proper Forms of Address:

Limey, lime-eater, pom, poof, sister-boy.


An Anecdote Illustrating Something of the English Character:

In his unpublished memoirs, Benjamin Disraeli tells the story of a political conference with then-Prime Minister William Gladstone, who habitually conducted such private discussions while being fellated by an able-bodied seaman of the Royal Navy. At one point during their talk, the sailor suddenly looked up from Gladstone's penis and said, "Excuse me, Sir, but you've come."
"By Jove, so I have," said Gladstone, and he gave the tar a sovereign.

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Message 31/39                 Date: 13-Oct-05  @  09:59 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

beds

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see the kind of neighbours we have to put up with?

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Message 32/39                 Date: 13-Oct-05  @  10:11 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

milan

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that website is hardcore

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Message 33/39                 Date: 13-Oct-05  @  12:13 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

k

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___________________________________

I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!

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Message 34/39                 Date: 15-Oct-05  @  04:19 AM     Edit: 16-Oct-05  |  12:17 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

Pongoid

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Fuckin full on, man. Well out of order. Nearly pissed myself.

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Message 35/39                 Date: 17-Mar-06  @  06:36 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

beds

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more fucking welsh




same story

personally, i wouldn't want a group of pissed up caernarfon slappers in my hotel any day.

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Message 36/39                 Date: 18-Mar-06  @  10:47 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

Maarten

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lol, Class-A website!

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Message 37/39                 Date: 06-Jun-06  @  10:06 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

beds

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hehe

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Message 38/39                 Date: 08-Jun-06  @  10:55 AM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

beds

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"incessant" flag-waving in Wales

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Message 39/39                 Date: 08-Jun-06  @  03:59 PM   -   RE: fcuking welsh

k

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Jesus wept, is this what we've come to... a Police chief making statements about shite like this? - fuck me sideways


kinda funny the head of welsh police is english, lol... Meister Wolfendale... owwooooooooooo!

___________________________________

I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!

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