Message 109/113
Date: 09-Oct-02 @ 11:07 AM -
RE: Drug Addicts...
Repost for 99
Well here we are, eh?
Reflecting a shape to it rather than the sound it makes.
"Destroy and create in the same hand" feels right, perhaps the sound is the that of cut and the healing, or the cut and the continual probing and pulling of the scab so it never heals (perhaps that's the album or the 12" mix).
I think that drugs are a way to sensitise and like any significant event (bird leaving you, realisation of shit life, dead dog etc) it is a significant change to a future personally envisaged. The creativity is the flow into the void made by realisation of a difference.
For me I thought sometimes that i stood on a box, senses filled by the screen filling my view. The booze etc was there to have me on my tiptoes (unstable for sure) but able to peek around the surface of the screen, being amazed by the simplicity of the levers and their interactions that yielded the complex picture i would ordinarily percieve. The event would have me seeing both ways, into myself to see the mechanisms of recognition (forming a control) and from there out to the levers working the view. I could easily be off it by myself here but hey so what - as long as i like it it's got to OK. It's all relative but we are all the same, thats why even the most selfish expressions will find those in understanding (see shared states at raves, favourite love songs, invoking other senses whilst listening to music - smells etc), and so much more remembered for it.
I rarely saw the behind picture and it changed depending on my mood but the collection of experiences from 'around the back' make me feel like i have done something that i would wish to pass on and the unspeakable strangeness of it expressed through standard means such as words, music or tones of conversation brings the completely personal experience more into a genrally accessable format for public consumption (dance mix) or private preoccupation (accapela)
For me I think that new experiences (induced or not) keep me intertested enough to "get on one about it", to create a something and then feel confident enough to venture to take peoples time without feeling I am wasting their time.
I suspect there is a direct link between separation from reality, realisation of context and ability to create something relevant to that reality, if there really are few levers (and no original thought) the expression of it is possibly the only aspect the artist can contribute to the work.
"Whatever we choose to do to reach a place is nothing compared the effects of the weather there"